My Teammates Are All Crazy

Hú Shēng Yǒu Mèng - 狐生有梦

Chapter 2

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Those watching Jing Yu's have all seen him play as Frozen Heart before.  Even so, watching him counter-kill Burial Sword with only a sliver of health, they couldn't help but excitedly comment all sorts of wails and exclamations, accompanied by "666".

A second ago, Burial Sword's health had been much higher than Frozen Heart's, yet a second later, their health bars were swapped.  Frozen Heart's counter-kill with only drops of blood was too exhilarating!

Not only was the enemy camp shocked, his team was the same.

【Enemy】 Petals in the Stream (Burial Sword):  F*ck!

【Ally】 XX (Lilith):  ?!

【Ally】 Gold Fish not Salted Fish (Frozen Heart):  Ey hey~

After getting first blood, Jing Yu's Frozen Blade successfully levelled up to Lv. 2.  While Flash, a must-bring skill for junglers, was still on cooldown, he leisurely farmed the jungle, while interacting with the bullet comments.  "I solo'd Burial Sword!  Did anyone win that bet?"

【Yup, yup!】

【Mommy, this episode is a rerun!】

【History always repeats itself in such a similar manner.】

【A moment of silence for the dumbstruck Burial Sword.】

【Gold Fish's Cutiepie threw a shallow-water bomb!】

Hearing the system prompt, Jing Yu quickly said, "Wah, thank you for the shallow-water bomb, boss!" Saying so, he took the time to glance at the bullet comments.

【The enemy's a total noob, he can't even kill Frozen Heart.】

Jing Yu lightheartedly laughed, "Don't say it like that, the enemy wasn't noob at all, I'm just too strong~" He began to swell up[1].

Still, however much his words fill with hot air, his controls were always careful and on point.

Once he reached Lv. 6 and obtained his ultimate, Jing Yu immediately opened up battle stats to check the exp and gold difference between the teams, quickly finding a target for his first gank - the enemy ADC.

Truthfully, Jing Yu was better at ganking the mid laner mage, and those who frequent his streams were more than used to seeing him forming a tag team with the ally mage.

But he calculated their exp and gold difference.  This time, as soon as the ally mage didn't move according to his plans, it would likely become a path of no return - the enemy mage could take his life using only their 1st ability.

Plus, watching the battle situation on the minimap, he predicted that it was about time to gank the bottom lane.

And so very quickly, under the expectant gazes of those watching the live stream, Frozen Heart, emitting an aura of coldness, floated towards the back of the enemy's bottom tower, while checking brushes along the way.

For Frozen Heart, this was a very dangerous positioning to be in.  Frozen Heart's 2nd ability, Snow Allure, wasn't a direction-targeted mobility skill like most jungler abilities.  It could only link onto an enemy demon, and then drag Frozen Heart towards the enemy.

This ability would honestly be very useful, especially when it comes to securing kills.  It can move towards an enemy with perfect precision, while dealing a large amount of damage.  The problem was, the one bestowed with this skill was 《Demon Lord》's number one squishy, Frozen Heart.

And so, what could have been a good kill-securing ability became a suicide ability in the hands of most players. They'll use it, and then they'll die, they'll use it, and then they'll die — one of the reasons why those who use Frozen Heart to rank will be flamed.

But Jing Yu wasn't just anyone.

He started using Frozen heart from the very first month he began playing 《Demon Lord》, and by now his mastery on Frozen Heart was already maxed out, with a win rate of over 75%.

His closest win was when their team's top, mid, and bottom lanes had all collapsed, yet he managed to hold the tempo by himself, winning the game 38:61.  His end score was 21 kills, 15 a.s.sists, which is to say, there were only two kills that he didn't have a hand in.

So, when other people see him choose Frozen Heart, they're all thinking it's a sure loss, but from the moment Jing Yu picks Frozen Heart, the only thing on his mind is victory!

Jing Yu waited patiently in the brush.  The second that their team's marksman forced the enemy marksman under the tower, he instantly used Frozen Heart's linking ability to move under the tower, dealing out his ultimate, before immediately Flashing behind the ally marksman.

The enemy marksman's health had been above two-thirds, but after taking damage from Frozen Heart's linking ability and ultimate, he only had a sliver of health left.  The allied marksman hit him with an auto, successfully securing the kill!

The opponent support belatedly activated his shield after everything was already over.  He hadn't expecting that Frozen Shield would appear from behind their own tower - this Frozen Heart was really too bold!

Indeed, given how squishy Frozen Heart was, it was impossible for them to tower tank.  Just by taking one hit from the turret, only a slice of blood was left.

Because of this, Jing Yu used his Flash without hesitation, giving up the opportunity to take the kill with his 1st ability.

However, it wasn't a problem.  Victory belongs to the whole team!

【System】 True Arrow has slain an enemy!

【System】 The enemy Chiron has been defeated!

【Enemy】 YIYI (Chiron):  ……

【Enemy】 YIYI (Chiron):  Our jungler was too slow.

【Enemy】 Petals in the Stream (Burial Sword):  I'm not taking the blame, it's all because this Frozen Heart is insane!

【Ally】 Gold Fish not Salted Fish (Frozen Heart):  Ey hey~

By this time, Jing Yu had already recalled back to the fountain.  As soon as his health was mostly recovered, he hurriedly floated towards the top lane.

The cons to Frozen Heart were very evident: they were squishy and their 2nd ability was a suicide skill.  But they also had clear advantages: high damage and an ultimate with crowd control.

If it wasn't for Frozen Heart's ult that froze Chiron near the edge of the turret, True Arrow wouldn't be able to kill Chiron without taking damage from the turret.

The players on the battlefield, whether they were allies or enemies, all thought that Frozen Heart was too daring.  After all, in only a moment's difference, the entire situation would have been reversed.

However, to Jing Yu, all of this was within his calculations, without the slightest deviation.

As a cautious squishy jungler, he rarely fought directly unless he was completely sure that he'd win.  Before he makes any moves, he always chooses his target long in advance, and doesn't do anything that isn't necessary.

So, as long as he made a move, the whole team would definitely get kills!

After floating to top, Jing Yu first hid Frozen Heart in the brush, then opened the minimap to watch top lane's condition.

That XX had a bad temper, but his skills were pretty good, pressuring the enemy solo laner the whole game.

At the moment, the other side's solo laner only had half a bar of health and was dejectedly clearing creeps under his tower.  And XX, taking advantage of his longer reach, kept using his 1st ability to hara.s.s and lick at the opponent's health.

Noticing that Frozen Heart was nearby, XX sent out two "attack" pings in close succession.  Jing Yu pretended not to see.

"What do you mean attack, did you already forget that I'm Frozen Heart?  The enemy has that much blood left.  If I attack him under their tower, wouldn't I be looking for death?"  Jing Yu's lips twitched.  He continued to squat in his brush, patiently waiting until the enemy solo laner cleared a wave of creeps and recalled home.  Then, Jing Yu rushed out and helped XX push the top outer turret.

*** You are reading on ***

Less than twenty minutes later, they aced the other team, and defeated the Dark Dragon.

Before the Dark Dragon even started advancing, the enemy team had already surrendered.

The word victory appeared in large gold letters on the screen, and after disappearing, Frozen Heart's 3D special effects page was shown.

Twelve kills, zero deaths, and eight a.s.sists, the MVP without compet.i.tion.

Jing Yu stretched, taking off his headphones and resting his ears for while, before putting them on again.  He looked at the comments on the other screen, "There's too many people that flame Frozen Heart, why don't I play a round using a different demon?  Or maybe I should play standard mode instead of ranking?"

He isn't used to the Bullet Comment Helper, so he always uses two computers, one of which shows his live stream room.

【Whatever makes you happy!】

【Standard mode! I want to watch Gold Fish-sama play Frozen Heart, but I don't want to see Gold Fish-sama get flamed anymore, my heart hurts.】

"There's griefers everywhere, even in standard mode.  But, it's all good~" Jing Yu laughed a little, "My Frozen Heart is undefeatable!  Those who flame me can only wait to be face-slapped!"

【He's swelling up[1].】

【This flag[3]……】

【Gold Fish-sama, you're making me nervous.】

As these comments flashed by, Jing Yu clicked on Standard Match.

After reaching the demon selection interface, he once again instalocked Frozen Heart.

However, what he didn't expect was - right after he locked Frozen Heart, his four teammates instalocked…… Guren, Faar, Sonde, and Voïa.

–Four out of five demons from what players call the "newbie gift pack".

Guren was the ground elemental sprite, Faar, the fire elemental sprite, Sonde, the thunder elemental sprite, and Voïa, the water elemental sprite.

And then there was Wendy, the wind elemental sprite.

This was a pack of five elemental demons that every player receives upon entering the game.  Basically, only new players who didn't have any other demons will use them, well-deserving of the "newbie gift pack" t.i.tle.


This time, it was Jing Yu's turn to flame his teammates.

【Team】 Gold Fish not Salted Fish:  Bots?!

【Team】 asdf: No.

【Team】 jkll: Real people.

【Team】 adddd: lalala~

【Team】 hhhh: Jungle, wanna change to the wind elemental?  Let's have fun together!

【Team】 Gold Fish not Salted Fish:  ……


[1] 他开始膨胀了 - he/(his ego) is swelling up

[2] 路人位 - pa.s.sers-by list?

[3] 这flag立得 - 立flag means something like jinxing oneself.  There was a saying that ~ translates to "flags were set to be broken" (I don't remember the original).

TL note:  I'm really sorry about how late this is.  Thank you for all of the comments on Ch. 1; this was a really fun story to read, and I do enjoy translating it.  I'm aiming for a chapter a week for the next few chapters, although I apologize in advance if I don't make it. I'm sorry if I made mistakes while translating, or if some things weren't really clear – this is my first time translating a novel, and while I did a bit of scanlating many years ago, it was editing/typesetting.  Please let me know if you see any mistakes or have any suggestions!

*** You are reading on ***

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